News time, children.

Actually, there isn’t much to be said.  I was sick all weekend, and am still feeling some of the effects.  I was sneezing so hard, it hurt.  I spent the time sniffing, popping Motrin, and playing Fallout 3.  And I am still feeling the effects.  Hooray.

So Kassandra is finally in the strip, that only took years.  I think the cast is pretty well rounded at this point, unless we need a talking animal.  Or another guy.  Kind of the same thing though, am I right ladies?  Haw.

Right, we’re done until Friday.  Hopefully I am still alive then.

Alright, no more Mass Effect 2 references for awhile.  No, Marc isn’t dead.  Yes, that is Marc, and not Wade.  I’m not even sure where that tall building came from.  It was just there, and we will move on.

I finished Bioshock 2, leaving me in contemplation of a strip for it.  The game is good, but not daring enough to become a parody without working it.  It was a step over the original in terms of gameplay, but I think it separated itself in the moral choices available.  In the first game, the choices were more black and white… save little girls, or kill them.  Not really a gray area there.  In the second, you’re given a bit more to chew on.  Wrath, mercy, pity, forgiveness… I admit, I had to think on my actions.  I think it is leading us somewhere in games, to a point where the choices in morality based games are not, “Good choice, bad choice”, but truly personal decisions.  Kind of like… oh, Planescape: Torment?  If that game wasn’t 15 years ahead of it’s time, I don’t know what was.

No one has asked, but I am sure a few people are wondering why there are not any Wednesday updates.  The answer is, I’ve decided not to push them or myself on doing them until I have a bit of a strip buffer.  My ability to post these is pretty disjointed right now, and I am still getting back into the feel of it all.  So it will remain a Monday/Friday schedule for the time being.

So I will see you Monday.

Today’s strip refers to an event that took place over a year ago at this point, but only a month or so ago in the strip.  Many people assumed this was Aikida and Wade having sex, but really, if they were, I just would have shown it (to a point).  A cunning few guessed correctly, and here we have it.  Not quite the reveal I had planned, but it has been out there too long, and needs to be dealt with.  Everyone is gay now, or so it seems.  What a ferocious dilemma.

Saints win the Super Bowl.  Congrats, I suppose.  I admit I was pulling for Peyton and the Colts, but I can’t feel bad for something nice happening to New Orleans, and I do like Drew Brees.  Good on them.

I really do not have much else to say, it seems.  I finished my ME2 insanity playthrough yesterday (and got the final achievement I needed for the game), and as rewarding as it was, I think I am ready to put the game down for awhile, or at least until some nice DLC is available.  That was four complete playthroughs.  Yes, I need help.  A final note on insanity difficulty… infiltrator is totally the way to go, trust me.

Back on Friday, I suppose.

I wouldn’t know what to stay, either, though I am unsure if I would just try and hide.  We may never know for sure what went on behind that door, but we can guess.  More importantly, Aikida can guess, and she seems to have guessed that office supplies were getting it on like Donkey Kong.  With barrels and hammers and everything.

I am working through Mass Effect 2 on insanity difficulty, and I will admit, this is the way to play it.  It is hard, but not impossible.  What makes it more rewarding is that each and every gunfight becomes a tactical situation.  Squad selection choices are paramount, not just “who should get some face time?”  Finishing each mission is a deep sigh of relief, not just another step towards the end of the game.  I cannot recommend this enough.

Here are a few tips for your Insanity odyssey, if you’re interested:

• For the sake of your nerves, save your insanity playthrough until your 2nd or 3rd time.  Knowing the fights ahead of time and having a feel for who does what is very, very valuable.
• Do not import your character from a previous ME2 playthrough, trust me on this.  The game scales the enemies to your level, but removes all your researched upgrades when you start again.  This means you’ll be fighting scaled level 25-30 enemies using crap guns and powers.   If you start fresh, you’ll be a bit more even with the bad guys until you get those upgrades researched.
• Pick your class wisely.  Adepts seemed weak in regular ME2, I’d imagine they’d be hard on insanity.  Soldiers are tough, but not versatile.  I’m not saying these are impossible picks, but you’re making it harder on yourself.  I went with an infiltrator, and chose armor-piercing ammo (everything in insanity has armor or shields, or both) as my bonus power.  Mixed with the cloaking power, disruptor ammo, incinerate and the M-98 rifle, and you have a character with a lot of options.
• Build your squad wisely, and and choose your mission team just as well.  Cap some teammates with area of effect powers, and don’t be afraid to specialize others for very specific enemies.  I set up Garrus with the AoE overload (to drain shields) and Tali with the AoE AI hacking, and use them exclusively for geth missions.  I have Dr. Mordin (the very model of a scientist salarian) specced into heavy incinerate, mixed with my AoE incinerate, and Grunt’s incendiary ammo and regeneration, and this is my Husk/Scion team (Husks/scions are probably the most difficult challenges in the game, after Praetorians. Cloak + sniper shot to the scion head help a lot).  Mix in Miranda and her +squad damage ability wherever else you can, and you will have an easier go of it.  Legion and Garrus are very useful because of their versatility (sniper rifles/assault rifles), and you will find yourself using them a lot.  I did.
• You will need to position your squad manually and probably use their powers manually as well.
• Choose weapons wisely, for you and NPCs.  NPCs never run out of ammo, so I always have my snipers running with the default sniper rifle.  It hits hard, and they don’t have to worry about the ten shot mag.  There’s also a geth assault rifle on hard/insanity difficulty, but it works best on shields.  Best to go back to the 5 round burst rifle on armored foes.
• Krogan are not as tough as you think, as long as you can burn through their armor fast (incinerate) and have a biotic with Pull.  Pull them as soon as their armor is down, and shoot the floating pinata.
• The Cain isn’t as awesome on insanity difficulty as it is on other levels.  I use the grenade launcher more, and the collector beam.
• Here are some of the tougher missions on insanity that you may want to plan ahead on; Rescuing Garrus (the shutters), Horizon (husks, scions, collectors and a praetorian, before you have any good weapons or upgrades.  Hump pillars, and be glad you were an infiltrator if you went that way), Tali’s rescue (On the approach to the colossus.  This takes a lot of patience and moving your squad along slowly to get into position.  Great fun!), The reaper IFF (Lots of husks and scions.  Bring Mordin, have incinerate maxed), and the suicide mission, obviously.  Most other fights are doable once you get into the rhythm, and become kind of enjoyable.
• Research everything you can, even guns you personally do not use.  You will need you NPC squaddies as tough as you, trust me.  Yes, this means more mining.  Suck it up.
• Any time you can use a Renegade moment to thin the herd a bit, do it.  Be a bad ass, and even the odds, all at the same time.  It helps.
• Enjoy your achievement.

The donation incentive has been modified, as I have added another wallpaper.  If you had donated since the last (BFF!) incentive went up, you will receive the new one as well if you donated 10 bucks.  As is, both are a package, and I think they’re a good one!  The Kassie image turned out very nicely, I think.

More scissors on Monday.  Enjoy your insanity playthroughs!  (You can do it!)

I’ve finished Mass Effect 2 a few times now, and have utterly given up on trying to keep the fish alive.  I am not sure what sort of mystical method of measuring time fish keep in space, but it seems they need to be fed every thirty minutes.  So I’ve given up on my fish mastery, and stuck with the space hamster (and sometimes Tali), as the sole non-Shepard entities of my space loft.  Also, instead of using the standard “iconic” Shepard, I used my own.  The noble young engineer, Sara Shepard has been a part of my Xbox 360 for nearly three years.  She has earned this.

The game isn’t perfect, but what game is?  That being said, I am nearing the territory where I say from a perspective on the narrative alone, ME2 may be the best game I’ve played in years, if not ever.  BioWare mastered storytelling a decade ago, but ME2 really displays the cinematic chops they’ve developed of late.  From the lighting, dialogue, and timing, we have a story that overwhelms its own shortcomings with a fantastic balance of action and roleplaying.

Of course, I’ve been drinking BioWare kool-aid since Baldur’s Gate was released, so take that all with a grain of salt.  I’ve also been waiting for this game since the moment I finished the original, and the highest praise I can give it is that those two (three?) years of lofty hopes were not let down.

Sure, there are some things I don’t like.  The simplification of the class system hurt a bit, and the new “clip” system for the guns seemed to blatantly undermine some of the lore of the Mass Effect world.  But I recognize these were fixes.  In the original, some classes were insanely overpowered (Adepts, engineers), and with the right weapon upgrades, you could fire an assault rifle continuously without it ever overheating.  The classes are now mostly balanced (Though adepts were a bit underwhelming this time around), and the heatclip system does add another level of tactics.  And hell, when my infiltrator fires off a devastating round from her geth sniper rifle and ejects a smoking clip, that looks *cool*.  I can deal with that.

But, this isn’t a review site, or a review article.  I like ME2, but most people who know me knew I would.  I am a gamer, a gamer who enjoys those great moments in games.  Most games of decent quality will have one of those moments, maybe two.  Mass Effect 2 has, like, a dozen, or more.  You know, those moments where you pull something off, and have to say (out loud) something to the effect of “Nice”, or “Fuck yeah”.

Here are some of those moments I loved from ME2.

*SPOILERS AND SUCH AHEAD*

-Anything to do with Grunt.  Not a rich character, but a unique one with some great lines, and good voice acting.  The “Heh… point” line, with the finger quotes was superb.
-Garrus.  Still my favourite NPC from both games, voice acted so well with great dialogue.  I almost cried when I got him killed on my first playthrough.  Brutal stuff.
-Mordin singing Gilbert & Sullivan.
-Nailing Tali.  Unfortunately, I had to play a male Shepard to do it.  Not been a fan of the male Shepard’s voice, his voice just seems to lack character.  Jennifer Hale is fantastic as Miss Shepard, she gets it.
-”I enjoy the sight of humans on their knees… that is a joke.”
-Feeling sorry for the Collectors as the Reapers abandon them to their doom, especially in that final scene of the station going nova.  Very nice touch of pathos.
-No Mako.
-The world design.  So much more layered, with awesome lighting.  Felt a lot more “real” than the first game.
-”No data.”
-”You’re working too hard.”
-I did like the Illusive Man.  He was written so ambiguously that you never could get a feel for what he might do next.  He was potent enough, but subtle and cunning, and most other writing staffs may have easily fallen into the trap of making him a little too over the top.
-Michael Hogan doing any voicework.
-The look on the salarian’s face after Shepard and Miranda kill some of his pals, and drop an explosive tank on the rest during Miranda’s loyalty mission.
-The time dilation ability Infiltrator’s get when sniping.  Love it.
-”I’m Commander Shepard, and this is my favourite store on the Citadel.”
-Punching out that reporter.  Again.
-Shooting Conrad in the foot.
-Blasto, the first Hanar spectre.
-Tali’s reaction to her dead father.  Not a “Nice!” moment, but one that maybe choked me up a bit.  The poor kid.
-Jack (or your biotic of choice) unloading a blast on the Collectors at the end of the section of the last mission where you need the biotic bubble.  The cutscene is *perfectly* scored and paced.  The entire final mission does have a great sense of urgency and danger that you find rarely in games today.  Well done, even with the obligatory boss fight at the end.
-Kal’Reegar.  Realitic exhange under fire with the quarian soldier on the mission to recruit Tali.  I liked him.
-More Seth Green.
-F-bombs!
-Engineer drones.

*SPOILERS OVER*

Hopefully we’re back on Friday.  I’m working on a smoking hot picture of Kassandra.  Hot.

“I should go.”

Yes, the title is a Family Guy reference.  Please, do not send emails claiming I ripped it off.  That would be stupid, for all parties.

Evil Kassandra is coming back to the strip for the first time in four years.  For new readers, you’ve never met Kassandra.  Well, you are in for a treat, if you find horrible, manipulative women to be a treat.  I do not, but she is fun to write for.

A note to some of the people who found my decision to remove the ability to comment odd, as mentioned before, most of the “constructive criticism” really wasn’t constructive at all.  I find the people who honestly care, and have suggestions, will take the time to compose an email.  The main reason to stop it was simply that I have to manually approve each comment, and sort through the spam comments as well.  This can be dozens of comments each day, and I only have access to the internet three or so times a week… I just don’t have the time for it.  So there you go.

Not too much else to say today.  I am waiting eagerly for my collector’s edition copy of Mass Effect 2 to show up, hopefully tomorrow.  I pre-ordered back in November, and here we are, finally.  Dragon Age was a warm-up.  This is the big show.  Hopefully this parlays itself into a Mass Effect strip on Friday.

And I will see you then.

This strip is a day overdue since I misinformed myself about the hours of my source of free wireless.  What sort of library closes at 5 pm on a Friday?  This one.  This one does.  No steady source of the series of tubes is something of a burden, but we will make do.  We must.

This strip is… well, I think it describes itself.  It is also much better drawn than the previous, I think, though Pepper inexplicably has lipstick on in the third panel.  She just does.  We have to accept that fact and move on with our lives.

I felt somewhat douche-ish for throwing up a donation picture so soon after returning, but to me, it is just being proactive.  Get something up while I have the urge to draw, and do it early in case there are people out there with kind souls and disposable income.  To make up for it somewhat, I did do a rather free wallpaper image, which you can find in the Extras section.

I considered just calling it the “Bootylicious” image, because it really does unveil Aikida in all her curvy gloriousness.  I like how the image turned out, and love the look (and her hair!).  Some people complain that Aikida and her curves are somewhat unrealistic, but this is kind of the point.  One, she is a cartoon.  Work that one out.  Two, part of what makes her her is that she does have this unrealistic body, and her inability to fully come to terms with it is one of her layers.

This is the amazon I wanted.  Sydney and Pepper are skinny enough for the “realists” I hope, leave the men their fantasies.

I saw “Up in the Air” finally, and it was fantastic.  Like, watch-twice-in-a-row fantastic.  The scene where Anna Kendrick starts crying in the airport was the funniest, most charming thing I’ve seen in a movie in a long time.  Go see it, it can appeal to anyone with an above-average intelligence, I promise.

New strip on Monday or Tuesday, hopefully.  Go Saints, Go Colts. (I’ve probably just jinxed them both)

Nothing says lovin’ from the oven like a new strip with a new character.  Eleanor is a name I’ve used before, but this is a different young lady.  I wanted to expand the cast on my comeback, give Syd a friend her own age (whatever that may be), draw some schoolgirl uniforms, and toss in one more cute lass.  We’ve done all of these things here.

As always, I am apologetic for the art (I don’t know what happened to Eleanor & Syd’s hand holding… it was just a  mess).  That and the writing are stilted right now, but coming along slowly.  These first few strips are mostly just me getting my reps in.  At this point, I am more worried about the hokey writing than the clunky art… the art was never that swell, but I took pride in some of the writing.  There were some glimpses of it today, though, mainly with Pepper dialogue.  It just comes naturally with her, which is why I pondered giving her her own strip briefly.

If you’ve emailed me recently, it will be some time before I get to it.  As mentioned before, I do not have regular net access, so I can’t keep on top of email.  I’m naturally slow with it at the best of times, so now it is even worse.  I am a wizard at being lazy.

Also, is it me, or are the fonts giant?  How rusty is that?  Come back, and use the wrong size letter of letter font.  That is all sorts of nerd crazy.

More later.  Probably a pin-up/wallpaper of Eleanor and Syd frolicking.  Sweet.

EDIT:  There is a wallpaper up in the donation section, if that’s your sort of thing.  I’m working on a free one for all to be had, on Friday.

So what was old, is once again new. And old.  Still.

This strip is not funny, of course.  The goal here wasn’t to make it that, the goal here was simply to make it.  I’ve also had the urge to draw Aikida a bit more curvier, and this is her dealing with it.  Not well!

It’s hard to believe it’s been that long since we last had a post here.  That long to get sorted out, find a job, a place to live, restart everything.  Life was a blur for months, and then suddenly went quiet.  Suddenly I had some time to stop and breathe, and I said, “Man, what am I going to do with this free time?”  A friend who has never read this comic brought up the idea of returning, but at first I thought it was too late.  Not only had it been too long, maybe I was just getting too old for this.

But I decided to try again.  I considered a new series (featuring mainly Pepper and Sydney), I considered going back to the fantasy arc, I considered just moving on to a novel or screenplay or something.  Yet, in the very end, it seemed easiest to return to the format I always return to.  Four panels, a sexy redhead, dork references and f-bombs by the dozen.

It was interesting being away from the comic, and this time not having it be because of the comic itself.  This time it was just the need to address life.  We’ve all needed that time, and if you haven’t yet, you will.  Also, I haven’t had internet access for months, and continue not to (I am at the library as I type this).

This all boils down to nothing that you care about, other than the fact that you endured another gap in comics.  It has happened before, it will happen again.  But the strip is back, though at best, two times a week.  There will be a few other changes to the site as well.

First, I am done with the comments.  I am just not the sort of guy who handles negative criticism well, and it became such a focal point for me, that there were days I dreaded posting a strip because there was always one dude out there who would absolutely get off on pointing out I drew an ear wrong or they didn’t like how I drew an expression.  To some this may seem like a petty point, but I have come to terms with my nature, and find it is best for the strip overall if I just remove the avenue for someone to ruin my day for their own pleasure.  If you have something to say abuot the strip, email me.  I find that people generally put more thought into those.

Second, I am going to steer myself away from the long stories.  I Just can’t stick to them.  My ideas come and go so fast, that staying with one for more than two weeks is horrendous and always drags the strip to a halt.  I like continuity, but I think I can still do it in four panels.  Also, I am just not in a place where I can finish the last story arc (about the death in the family), so not only will it be shelved for awhile, it will most likely be pulled from the archives.  So there you go.

Enough from me, though.  Next strip will probably be on Monday.

This is not a cause for rejoicing.  It’s just another comic you can perhaps put back on your bookmark list.

Hi mom.

I am a big fan of this new art, brave style. I really like the open, expressive faces and simple linework.   Since a vocal minority of our readers are accomplished art critics, I am eager to hear their thoughts.  With so many complaints about how I was drawing noses, I simplified things by just removing them.  And eyes.  And mouths.

You can also see how the strip started as a black and white work, before I cleverly and subtly blended in colour half way through.  You probably didn’t even notice.  You may have been enchanted by the flowing script.  Really, it was less a labour of language, and more like pouring honey directly on to a page… honey.

To achieve this style, I draw it like would have any past strip… full details, eyes, noses (terrible! tsk), clothes… all of that stuff.  Once I have the basic shape and pose established, I draw a simple black circle in the rough shape of the head, then carefully break down the contour of the body into but one simple line.  This process takes so many facets into account, and can take about ten minutes per character, to properly portray the soul… the sense of being that each drawn actor must display.  The line itself has to say so many things, so one cannot simply swipe a black mark down the page.  Egads, no!

With my circle and spirit rending line drawn, the rest of the useless (faces, expressions, fingers, CRAP) shit is erased, and we move to the next step.  Technology!

The artwork is scanned and put through a painstaking process.  Twenty different layers of vibrant colour are condensed to properly give the strip its soul.  While these layers may seem to have merely condensed into shades of black, white and brown, you now know better because I told you.  Twenty layers is more than three… twenty is art.

To mark this epic(k) occasion in Aikida history, I have commemorated the moment with special wallpapers for your desktop.  You can download those here.  Take care as you do… the virile emotions from such simplistic yet raw artwork on your desktop every day can be a rollercoaster.  A rollercoaster of emotion as you stare in awe at this captured moment in time, only to have it torn away from you as you re-maximize your window depicting young asian ladies being pleasured on bullet trains.

I am giddy and rigid with excitement over this new direction.  I hope you are too!  A momentous day, and a day we can all share… sticking our dicks in the fourth wall*. That’s a metaphor!!

Have a gorgeous weekend!  Ahhh, art!

*Dick sticking only applicable to those with the organic or battery operated variety.  Maybe strap-ons.  Maybe Mexican surgery.  Don’t send me pics, either way,